Monday, December 3, 2012
Posted by
Maya R
at
12:37 PM
Labels:
assertiveness,
desteni,
fear,
joker,
judgment,
process,
self definition,
self expression,
self forgiveness,
serious,
steadfastness,
the joker,
time
This is a continuation from my previous blogs:
Day 104 - Nature reflecting my assertiveness
Day 105 - My relationship with Assertiveness
Day 106 - Assertiveness - Part 3 - Self forgiveness
Day 107 - assertiveness - "problem points"
Please read this blog for further insight A History with Life After Death – Part 10
"...the most Important Foundation Stone for your Process to Life Here on Earth, which is Steadfastness. It is Consistency. It is the Basis of your Existence. It is the Premise of One’s Equality. It is Who You Are, Breath by Breath. It is where you Face the Temptation of the Easy Road that is Always Presented by the Sugar-Lolly the System use to get you to Ignore the Total Reality and to Focus Only on your own Self Interest. Steadfastness – it is a Steady, yet Fast Movement, to make sure you’re not Shifted from That which Is Life, Equal, In All."
Day 104 - Nature reflecting my assertiveness
Day 105 - My relationship with Assertiveness
Day 106 - Assertiveness - Part 3 - Self forgiveness
Day 107 - assertiveness - "problem points"
I found several
definition of assertiveness
Assertive -
1. Confident and
direct in claiming one's rights or putting forward one's views.
2. Inclined to bold
or confident assertion; aggressively self-assured.
3. given to making
assertions or bold demands; dogmatic or aggressive
The word
assertiveness has been tainted with aggression, I see
this through my own application of the word as well as how it's been defined in
dictionaries - we live in a world that being confident and direct is related to
aggression, that's the extent of suppression we have allowed in this world - as
the only way one can express themselves directly and move forward would be
through using force, so we have a world where those that are confident and
successful had to force their way to the top, within allowing themselves to be
aggressive, but they are not all solely to blame because this is what we all accepted and allowed
as the demands within system , thus, we as the system have related
assertiveness and self direction with aggression and using force.
I was planning to
redefine assertiveness, but instead I was introduced to a new word -
steadfastness, this word represents everything that assertiveness represent but
doesn't have any aggressive connotations, steadfastness represents a stability,
which is not in relation to an interaction, it is a self stability, whereas
assertiveness is in relation to interaction and thus is not an unconditional
self stand, as it is within communication with
another, or towards another, thus, within assertiveness exist steadfastness,
but steadfastness exist regardless of assertiveness as a self stability and
clarity, steadfastness would then essentially be self assertiveness, an
assertiveness as an expression of self regardless the situation.
steadfast
1. fixed in
direction; steadily directed.
2. firm in purpose,
resolution as a person: a steadfast friend.
3. unwavering, as
resolution, adherence, etc.
4. firmly
established, as an institution or a state of affairs.
5. firmly fixed in
place or position.
Please read this blog for further insight A History with Life After Death – Part 10
"...the most Important Foundation Stone for your Process to Life Here on Earth, which is Steadfastness. It is Consistency. It is the Basis of your Existence. It is the Premise of One’s Equality. It is Who You Are, Breath by Breath. It is where you Face the Temptation of the Easy Road that is Always Presented by the Sugar-Lolly the System use to get you to Ignore the Total Reality and to Focus Only on your own Self Interest. Steadfastness – it is a Steady, yet Fast Movement, to make sure you’re not Shifted from That which Is Life, Equal, In All."
I forgive myself for
not accepting
and allowing myself to stand as steadfastness, thus not allowing myself to
stand firm, stable and clear within myself as self honesty as knowing who I am as life and
living myself as self expression in every moment
I forgive myself for
not accepting and allowing myself to be self assertive, within this I forgive
myself for not accepting and allowing myself to be assertive towards myself as
the mind
as I have allowed the mind
to direct me instead of allowing myself to be the directive principle
I forgive myself for
not accepting and allowing myself to accept myself as stable, serious, direct,
and thus have not allowed myself to live and express myself as steadfastness,
in fact I have defined myself as he contrary and thus have created characters
as the joker character that I have lived by and have thus allowed to direct me,
within not realizing that I am being directed by the character that I have
created within separation myself form steadfastness as the expression of self
as life
I forgive myself for
accepting and allowing myself to fear
the reactions of others within projecting onto them the self judgment
based in the self belief that I am not qualifies to express myself as
stability, thus fearing
experiencing the judgment
from them that will confirm my own self judgment, thus I have made a deliberate
choice
to avoid any stand within/as myself as to express myself as silly, and thus to
prevent any judgment that will confirm my own self judgment as inadequate, not
realizing that I have within this, created myself as inadequate and thus have
in fact manifested my fear as proving to myself my own self created self
belief, within this I realize that as long as I judge myself as incapable of
standing, as unworthy of standing within stability, I will continue fearing being judged
by others, thus I realize that my fear of being judged by others is mirroring
myself back to self, as showing me my own points of self judgment, and point I
have not allowed myself to accept as myself as one and equal
I forgive myself for
not accepting and allowing myself to accept myself as serious and thus have
separated myself from serious as an expression, within this I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to prove myself right within not allowing
myself to express myself as serious though using the polarity expression
as the joker and defining it as myself, within this I forgive myself for not
accepting and allowing myself to see, realize and understand that both serious
and the joker expressions are valid as self expression when striped of the
polarity I have attached to them, within giving them a value, and a preference,
thus, I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself see that the
value, preference I have given the serious and the joker expression have been
limiting me from actually expressing myself as either of them as myself -
because I have placed value/preference on these expressions I have used them as
self definition and have limited myself as my self expression within an act, a
performance, using these expression to suit my self interest, but within this I
have lost myself in the performance and have become enslaved to the expression
as not allowing myself to be serious "because it's not me" and
expressing myself as the joker when it is not my actual self expression as a
way to hide my true self expression from others as myself "because that's
who I am, funny, a joker"
I realize that I am
not defined by the character o believe to define me, thus, I realize I am not
defined as the joker and not as "not serious" within this I realize
that I can express myself in any expression and not limit myself as self definition,
thus, when and as I see myself going into the joker character, I stop myself
and breathe, I check my starting point, I check within self honesty if joking
around is an actual self expression or is a participation within a character,
thus if I realize that I am acting the character I stop myself, I breathe, and
do not allow myself to participate in the character, I realize this will cause
an inner conflict
because this is the expression I am so used to thus I commit myself to support
myself with breathing
and continue breathing as I return back to self, and align back with myself as
who I really am, thus not allowing myself to jump into character but breath
through it until the energy
has passed, within this I commit myself to when I see myself avoiding the
serious expression due to fear, and due to believing it isn't who I am, I stop
myself and breath, I allow myself to express myself in a stable and clear way
without running away to the joker character, I allow myself to explore myself
as clear, steadfast and stable without fear, within this I commit myself to
stop the polarity I have created between the joker and the serious as I have
realized both expressions are equally valid within a starting point of self
honesty as self expression, and both are equally not valid as a character,
participated within fear.
I commit myself to
walk this point in awareness in the next 7-14 days, and to realign myself and
investigate every specific point that come up where I see myself not standing
stable and instead turning to the joker character, or not allowing myself to express
myself seriously, within this I commit myself to right out the points that come
up and to forgive myself and correct my application and to free myself from the
limitations I have enslaved myself as within this point, and through freeing
myself from this point, allow myself to be one within the expression of
steadfastness in every moment of every breath - I realize this is a process and
will take time, thus, I commit myself to walk it day by day until I have
cleared myself from the points, until I have actually forgiven myself for how I
have allowed myself to exist and correct/change myself to live as self
expression within self honesty as living the principle that governs life as
oneness and equality, and thus living as what is best for all life
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Related articles
- Day 107 - assertiveness - "problem points"
- Day 106 - Assertiveness - Part 3 - Self forgiveness
- Day 105 - My relationship with Assertiveness
- Day 104 - Nature reflecting my assertiveness
- Day 57 - Blame Character - Part 7 - Society's Value System - Self Forgiveness
- Day 52 - Blame character - Part 2 - Reacting to Tonality - Self Forgiveness
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