Day 166 - Enslaved to Memories - Money and Morality

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for context please read my previous blogs:

Day 160 – A life changing Decision
Day 161 - Shame - I've done nothing with my life
Day 162 - Running ahead of myself
Day 163 - Running ahead of myself - Self forgiveness
Day 164 - Enslaved to Memories - Failed opportunity relived
Day 165 - Enslaved to Memories - Correction
 
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create a point of morality where I can only sell that which I have tried and tested for myself, while not considering that practically that cannot be a determining factor within this current system where people need to make a living and cannot be self righteous about only selling products that they have tested, as for example med can sell hygienic products for women and visa versa - thus I realize that any point of morality is a distraction, as placing the accountability on the sales person while not considering the entire money system as accountable for the fact that people even have to go out and try to sell to other people shit they might not need in order to survive the system - thus I realize that within the current system no morality exist, and trying to perceive myself as moral would be within separating myself from the system as I am the moral island in the deceit of the system - while in fact no one can honestly separate themselves from the system because we are all creating it within out participation, as everything we do is from the system, there is no escaping it - thus, by placing morality on small aspects within the system I am dissecting myself from the fact that the system in it's entity must change, and until it does nothing I do within it can hold any morality - it would be done as the rest from a practical perspective of survival within realizing that one must have money to live in the system.
 
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hide behind the sense of morality as a way to make myself feel good, as a way to believe myself to being a good person that feels bad for deceiving others, when in fact any dollar that moves in the current system is deceptive, thus, there is no escaping it - the only moral thing to do is change the system so that no one needs to deceive to survival and that the system is designed in such a way that it supports all equally and provides for all their requirements for a dignified and satisfied life
 
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that not all have the luxury of being moral about what they do for a living, and thus, that implies that the point of morality doesn't stand in equality, because only those that are already part of the elite can afford to have the inner conflict of morality and be picky about what to do or not do for a living - within these words I realize that any point of morality is just that, a point of inner conflict, as a mind construct, creating inner conflict and friction to produce more energy for the mind to thrive on, thus consuming the physical body as the resource for the mind's energy as the mind mines the physical for it's own survival - using morality as a point of "feeling good and positive" as to lure self into participation - thus, I stop! I realize morality is a scheme to create a positive energetic feeling and thus divert ones attention from he fact that the entire system in which we exist in and participate in is far from moral, and within it all being interconnected, ones morality is deceptive as they exist in the belief that they are not participating in the injustice of the system, when in fact we all are participating and creating it, not one of us can be excluded from the equation - thus, the only way can ensure that one doesn't have blood on their hands, is to bring about a system that support all life equally, that the system is constructed in designed in such a way that the individual will not have to decide between a moral and non moral jobs, because under the constitution only moral jobs will be allowed - as suggested in the Equal Money System - thus, I realize that until such a system is in place there is no point in participating in the minds diversion as morality, but to ensure that one is stable within oneself, here in the physical, doing what needs to be done to set oneself free of the mind's control and limitation, so that once and for all self can be trusted with life as life.
 

 
If you’d like to educate yourself further in regards to what money stands for within our lives – here are two recommendations - enjoy 
The Soul of Money
Life Review - The Money Experience
 
To learn more about yourself and how reality functions, please consider a FREE online Course
Desteni I Process Lite - Learn Practical Life Skills Online
 
Also, Please check out the following Links:
Desteni
Desteni Wiki
Desteni Forum
Desteni I Process
Equal Money System
Journey to Life Group
Eqafe Life Products - Self Help
Creation's Journey to Life
Heaven's Journey to LIfe
Earth's Journey to Life
Physics' Journey to Life

Day 137 - opinions, arguments and fear of conflict

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold on to my opinion when going into arguments within the desire to win the argument and prove my opinion right

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe arguments are bad and should be avoided, within that not actually allowing myself to state my opinion straight forward but instead I go around it, as trying not to step on any bodies tows as a way to avoid conflict / argument if possible, within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to suppress myself in order to avoid the argument not realizing that by keeping quiet I am creating back chat and inner conflict within myself - and thus, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself within the resistance / fear of conflict / arguments to create that which I fear as inner conflict

 

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that within my starting point of fear of conflict I am creating the conflict within myself and in the communication with another, as I am not standing stable as who I am and presenting my points in common sense, but am speaking from a point of fear, thus not speaking clearly and directly, thus asking for conflict while trying to avoid it

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to manipulate what I am actually saying and not speaking directly within the attempt to avoid conflict as an argument, within this I try to seem nice, I try to present my opinion as a win-win situation, as a best for all situation, not revealing my self interest even to myself, and thus I trap myself in a self belief that my opinion is valid while actually it is supporting my self interest, and within that I try and hide the self interest, as expressing myself awkwardly to not reveal what is actually behind my opinion as self interest - within this I see that this type of communication leads to conflict as the communication cannot be clear and direct

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to insist on my opinion within energy as the desire to be right, within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to identify with my opinion as believe it represents me, as if it is a part of me and thus I take it personally when my opinion is not heard or accepted as I experience it as if I am not being heard and accepted, and thus I take it as rejection, within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself within experiencing myself as rejected to go into my mind as back chat and attack and blame the other for creating this experience within me, not realizing that it is my doing through believing myself to be an opinion, and thus I am responsible for diminishing myself into an opinion and identify myself with it

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel like people are not listening to me when they do not agree with what I am saying within this, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not listen to others within the belief that I must be right, and thus I allow myself to participate in both sides of the coins, both as the opinionated and the not listening side, within this I realize that both sides are created within / as energy and thus both standing for an opinion in energy, or not listening in arrogance are equally in valid as they do not serve any one, I realize that by insisting in an opinion I identify with, or being insulted for not being heard, or not listening to another when they speak due to believing I am right, within all these participations I am compromising myself as diminishing myself to an opinion, compromising the opportunity to expand and learn from what others have to say, and participating in energy as within taking it personally and going into insult

 

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that anything I react to towards another I am actually showing myself a mirror back to self, and thus when I go into back chat of blame and judgment I am actually hiding from myself as to not see that I in fact am participating in the same pattern I am busy judging, within this I commit myself to investigate the points I react to, as experiencing myself as not being and investigate when do I not hear / listen to others as they speak, within this I commit myself to correct myself within a starting point of self honesty and make a directive decision if to listen to something or not, and within that to allow myself to express to the other person if I am listening or not, so as to make sure I don't participate in that which I judge, and within this I commit myself to investigate the point of morality that I am holding on to within the idea that people should listen to each other

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe people should listen to each other and within that I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to pretend to listen to people because I didn't want to tell them that am actually not listening, while going into my back chat and not allowing myself to be here with them in hearing them, or stand as myself in self honesty and communicate to them that I am not listening, within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear telling someone I am not listening to them because I fear it will create conflict, instead of realizing that by pretending to listen to someone I am creating inner conflict as back chat, and in most cases external back chat as the point build up, or if I "slip" and express my back chat which will then come out in spitefulness / arrogance / boredom… instead of respecting the other as myself and giving myself credit that I can handle standing as myself in self honesty