Showing posts with label responsibility. Show all posts
Showing posts with label responsibility. Show all posts
Tuesday, June 24, 2014
Here are the living principles that I stand by - I commit myself to persist in the process of becoming these living principles as the expression of myself.
2. Living by the principle of what is best for all – guiding me in thought, word and deed to always in all ways direct problems to the best possible outcome for all
3. Living by the principle of self honesty – to ensure I am pure in thought, word and deed: that my within and without is equal and one. Who I am within is who I am without and vice-versa
4. Self Purification through Writing, Self Forgiveness and Self Application – the action of realising I am responsible for my own thoughts, words and deeds, to forgive myself for transgressions and change myself to ensure I take responsibility for who, what and how I am and through this know that I can trust myself to always be honest with me and so others
5. Living the principle of Self Responsibility – realising only I am responsible for what I accept and allow inside of me, my relationships and my outside world and so with this responsibility: only I have the power and ability to change that which I see is compromising who I am, what I live and how this affects others
6. Realising that who I am in thought, word and deed affects not only myself – but others as well and so with Self Responsibility in thought, word and deed – I take responsibility for myself and so my relationships to be Self Aware in every moment and live in such a way that is best for me and so others as well
7. Living the Principle of Self Awareness – to be aware, to see, to recognize my own thoughts and Mind, to be self honest to the extent where I can take responsibility for when I see my thoughts / Mind is not what is best for me / others and commit to immediately take responsibility and change for myself and so for others
8. With taking responsibility for myself, becoming aware of myself – take responsibility and become aware of others in my life, to assist and support them as I am assisting and supporting myself – to give as you would like to receive and do the extra bit every day to see where I can contribute to other’s lives and so my own
9. Living the principle of self trust – as I commit myself to remain constant in my living of self honesty, self responsibility and self awareness, I stand as an unbending trust that I always in all ways know who I am no matter what I face and that in this I know, as proven in the constancy of my living that I will always honour and stand by what is best for all and so best for me
10. Making Love Visible – through me not accepting/allowing anything less than my utmost potential, I support those in my life to reach their utmost potential, to love them as I have shown love to myself by gifting to me my utmost potential, the best life/living experience and show others as I have shown myself what it means to LIVE
11. No one can save you, save yourself – the realisation that the tools and principles of Desteni is the guide, but I must walk the path myself. We are here to assist and support each other in this process from Consciousness to Awareness/LIFE and what it means to live – but the process itself, where you are alone with yourself in your own Mind: is walked alone
12. Not waiting for anything or anyone to take responsibility for me and this world – but that I realise I have created who and how I am in this moment, therefore I have the responsibility to change who and how I am and so the realisation that we as a collective created how and what this world is today and so it is the responsibility of the collective to change how and what this world is today
13. Honouring the life in each person, animal – everything from the great to the small of earth, that we expand our awareness and responsibility to creating the best possible life for everyone and everything and so ourselves
14. Relationships as Agreements: individuals coming together using agreements as a platform to one-on-one expand, grow and develop as individuals in life and living to support/assist each other unconditionally to reach their utmost potential where the agreement is a coming together of individuals understanding what it means to stand as equals and to stand as one
15. Sex as Self Expression – where sex is an united expression between individuals in honour, respect, consideration and regard of each other as equals, two physical bodies uniting in equality and oneness – a merging of two equals as one physically.
16. Realising that by the virtue of me being in this world – my responsibility does not only extend to my own Mind / my own Life, but to the minds and lives of everything and everyone of this earth and so my commitment is to extend this awareness to all of humanity to work together and live together to make this world heaven on earth for ourselves and the generations to come
17. I must in my thoughts, words and deeds – but most importantly in my living actions, become a living example for others in my world that is noticeable and visible when it comes to the potential of a person to change themselves and so change their world. So that more people can realise how we can change this world, by standing united in our self change within the principle of what is best for all to bring heaven to earth
18. I am the change I want to see in me and my world – to bring heaven to earth is to bring into being, into living the LIVING PROOF of a PRACTICAL HEAVEN that can be seen and heard in our actions and words. We are the Living Heaven that must come into creation in this living world.
19. Through purifying my thoughts, words and deeds – my inner becomes my outer, so I bring into creation me as heaven into earth, realising it is not enough to ‘see the change / be the change’ – for change to become REAL it must be a constant, consistent living of me through the words I speak and the actions I live visible and noticeable to all in every moment of breath
20. Realising that my physical body is my temple – my physical body is the living flesh through which and in which I will bring into being and create / manifest heaven on earth as me in my thoughts, words and deeds and so I honour, respect and regard – nurture and support my physical body as I would nurture and support me as equals: my body is me
21. We are the change in ourselves and this world we have been waiting for: and so I commit to dedicate myself and my life for each one as all to realise this, as nothing will change if we don’t change in all that we are, within and without
22. The realisation that for me to be able to change myself in thought, word and deed to the most effective living being that I can be and become – I first have to ‘know thyself’ and so commit myself to investigate, introspect and understand how I became who I am today, to prepare the road before me into self creation of a responsible, aware, self honest and trustworthy person for myself and so for all
23. The realisation that for me to be able to contribute to change in this world – I have to get to ‘know thyself’ as this world and so commit myself to research, investigate and introspect the inner and outer workings of this world and align the systems of today to present and give the best possible life for all on Earth
Thursday, March 21, 2013
this is a continuation of my previous blog:
Day 173 – Still not good enough
Day 174 - Laziness or Inadequacy?
Day 175 – Priorities
Day 176 - The Last Minute
Day 177 - Not Pushing Myself
a must hear - Why do we not access our full potential? Why do we hold ourselves back?:
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to place the self forgiveness statement yet leave them "bare" and not complete them with the directive understanding, decision and commitment as to how I would change practically
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that only self forgiveness is not enough for self to change - one must actually walk the correction in the physical reality as the expression of self, whereas the self commitment statements allow one to see and prepare self as to how one would do so, within and through writing the point as a self corrective statements, one can see more points of reaction within self, and more specific details as to what / when / how / where one must do to correct oneself.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to write self corrective statements within a starting point of not trusting myself that I will actually do them, and thus to exist within a self belief that I will let myself down and within this belief I do not push myself to even try because I fear failing myself
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear self judgment for failing myself, and thus, instead of giving myself the opportunity to write the commitment and to see how I handle it, to then allow myself to learn about myself through whether I apply the correction or not - instead of allowing myself to try and learn from what I now perceive as a failure, I have not allowed myself to even try, and so I avoid the possibility of failing- but within this I destroy the possibility of actually changing
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that this is a process, and within this process I am preparing myself through the tool of writing of self forgiveness and corrective statements, and thus, when I go into self judgment for not applying the corrective statement I am participating in the mind within not trusting myself and the process as myself, and within expectations which only create another relationship and thus personality in regards to my own application, tying myself down to another pattern of thought / emotion / feeling / back chat, instead of releasing myself - and thus, within this I realize that I must walk this process without the burden of expectation, but within giving myself the time and dedicating myself to the application, as to do what I can do in the moment without the future projections as fear and expectation, that hinder my self application here.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that I have been writing commitments in self dishonesty, from the perspective of not writing commitments that I can in fact walk as who I am, but writing them as a future projection, as what I would commit myself to when / as I change - but, in order to "get there" I realize I must draw the map for myself and then walk it, and by drawing the next piece of the map, without walking where I am, is another form of self sabotage, because obviously I cannot walk where I am not - I can only walk from the point I am at.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to be more than myself within writing commitments that are not aligned with where I actually am but rather with where I want to be, which on the one hand it's cool to know where I'm going, but on the other hand, in order to get there I must be willing to admit to where I am now without judging myself but simply within realizing and facing who / what / where I am at this very moment.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to sabotage myself within my process in writing commitment statements that do not reflect where I am at now and thus do not support me in walking from where I am here, but rather create a situation that I cannot walk the commitment as I am not "there" yet, and so I create frustration and resentment within myself towards myself my experience and my process - while all could have been prevented if I were to write within self honesty, within realizing this is a process, and committing myself to the process, to myself, to walk from where I am now, within allowing myself to see where I am now, and not within wanting to be someone / somewhere that I am not - as that is self dishonesty and creates consequences as inner conflict / friction
more on this point to come…
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Thursday, March 14, 2013
My response to the question: “So you would say that a law abiding citizen should in principle be equal to a murderer or psychopath?.” posted on Quora
it's not that "a law abiding citizen SHOULD in principle be equal to a murderer or psychopath" - it's that they ARE equal - we are all in fact equal, we are equal from many perspectives: we all have the same basic necessities, we all eat / drink / shit / breathe, we are all a product of our environment and upbringing, we are the outcome of our education and our life circumstances - From this perspective, you cannot attempt to compare a law abiding citizen and a murderer without looking into all the details of their lives - because you are trying to point fingers at the murderer and suggest that they solely are responsible for their character and behavior as you are implying that the law abiding citizen is responsible for his conduct - you are basically stating that parenting and education have nothing to do with how we end up, you are saying that our financial status, the support we receive as children growing up, the role models we had around us, the mental health of our family members - all that means nothing... I'm sure you realize that all these factors play a roll in how we turn out - and thus, as long as we don't have equal conditions, an equal basis to stand up from - how dare you compare the outcome? how dare you base who is deserving or worthy of a dignified life based on the outcome of the circumstances they were exposed to?
And yes, we are each responsible for who we are, and we can each walk a process of self responsibility and change / correct ourselves to the better - this isn't about holding on to blaming the circumstances and hiding behind our past - but, do most people have access, the finance, the ability, the knowledge or the support to walk an effective process of self empowerment? no, which is yet again another reason for equal money to be in place, because that will ensure the means to support all, to overcome their past, to let go of the blame, to forgive the circumstances of their lives, and to correct themselves as to become an effective citizen - a citizen that not only obey rules out of fear of consequence, but rather a citizen that actually respects themselves, honors life, and recognizes that their neighbors are their equals, and treats them as they would like to be treated.
Monday, December 10, 2012
The following blog is a continuation of my previous writings, please read them for further context if you haven’t already :
Day 110 - Avoiding Work
Day 111 – Self interest can never be “right”
Day 112 - Avoiding work –Part 3 - Self Forgiveness
Day 113 – Enjoying Work
Day 114 - Avoiding work –Part 5 - blame and manipulation - Self Forgiveness
Within taking the responsibility to do something, one must realize all aspects of the task - what I find tends to happen to me, is that I will take on a responsibility, it can be as simple as making a cake as I did the other day, and will not take into consideration all parts of the task from beginning to end. What I find is that I will exhibit a form of "selective memory syndrome" where, when it comes to ending the task, which includes cleaning the mess I've made while making the cake, and cleaning up the cake tray once it's done, I will go into resistance and "forget" that this is actually a integral part of making the cake - within completing the totality of the task.
What I see is that this has to do with accepting the task within a starting point of energy, as an excitement towards making the cake or the specific task at hand, while not actually considering within practicality all the stages necessary to be done - so I will find myself "slaving in the kitchen" to make the cake (even if the cake/task is an easy/simple one) - then once the main part of the task is over, as all the people have eaten the cake, the energetic high will have passed, and there will be no energetic motivation within me to complete the task.
In cases like this what I experience at this point is an expectation that somebody else will do it for me, within a justification of "but I've made it, shouldn't someone else clean it" - well, I have used such an argument many times before, while not allowing myself to see/realize that if I took on myself the responsibility I cannot expect and impose any part of it on anyone else unless it has been agreed upon to begin with.
I see here two main points, the first is going to the task within energy and thus overlooking in practicality what it entails, and then when the "fun part" part is over there is no more energy left to motivate me to move and complete the task, and then I become sluggish and resist doing it, this brings me to the other point, that exists within/as the debt system, where I do not do the task unconditionally but am expecting to get something in return, wither gratitude or in this case, when comes to the parts I don't enjoy, like the end part of cleaning, I turn to the back chat of "they owe me" because I made the cake so someone else must clean after me - "it's only fair…"
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to do tasks from a starting point of energy instead of making a self directive decision within considering the point in it's entity and not be directed by energy within the expectation for an experience as reward, within this I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to direct myself to do tasks within the principle of what is best for all and instead have been doing everything from a starting point of self interest as the desire to be rewarded within an energetic experience for doing the task, within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not actually chose/decide to do the task itself, but rather chose/decide to do the task in order to get the energetic rush I have associated with it, and thus have not allowed myself to direct myself but have allowed myself to be a puppet of energy, allowing myself to follow the positive energy feeling regardless of what the task is, kind of like being an energy whore… within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the task I am doing within both not considering all it's parts/aspects and secondly not allowing myself to actually be one with the task, but instead live in separation from the task as myself, and do it from a starting point of separation as getting an external energy as motivation and reward to do it
When and as I am doing a task or am about to do a task, I realign my starting point to make sure I am not doing it from a starting point of self interest as to get any reward as an energetic experience out of it, but rather do it to do it, unconditionally, for free, for the practicality of it being done and for the experience within doing it and while doing not, not as a reward that come later that will then define my success/failure of the task, but as a self expression that is done in the moment and then it is done with
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist within my privet self interest of individuality when I don't consider anything and anyone while present myself as if I do, while everything I do is based in the desire to serve my own interests such as getting an energetic rush for doing something "for others" within this I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize myself as life, as one and equal to all that is here, and within that to realize that acting from self interest is separating myself from the life within is myself, and thus creating in my life and the world as a whole conflict and friction within living as a "split personality" as the manifestation of separation of self derived from acting from a starting point of self interest, instead of including all life in all my decisions, and walking a path that is best for all and supports all life, and thus in every decision I make, I commit myself to stop and breathe, to investigate the starting point as myself and to correct/align myself as my starting point to that which I best for all within realizing that only that which is best for all is actually best for me as well, thus, when I do a task I realign my starting point to not allow myself to direct myself within/as energy, and within that I slow myself down, I consider all aspects of the task and will myself to complete them all as part of the responsibility I have taken, within building self respect as standing by my decision to do something and do it in completion
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to do things within a starting point of a debt system where I calculate my actions in relations to what I perceive others are doing, and judge and expect and demand that others pay up their debt that I have created within my mind, with no communication and agreement whatsoever, simply taking for granted that my set of values will be accepted by all and that my self interest will be accepted by all, and within this have not allowed myself to communicate and design a stable relationship with those around me, but simply doing things and then build up expectation that cause friction and conflict in all our worlds, instead of stopping myself within breath, and making sure that any thing I do I do unconditionally, and not expect any thing in return - I realize that if I detect any form of expectation to get anything in return for doing something, I know I have been acting from self interest and thus I commit myself to stop my back chat, and breathe until I have directed and grounded the expectation and can walk stable and do what needs to be done, without expecting anything in return, and within this allow myself to simply walk the task, as myself, to completion, to honor the task as myself as life as a whole and walk all practical physical steps that must be walked
To learn more about yourself and how reality function, please consider a FREE online Course
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Also, Please check out the following Links:
Desteni
Desteni Wiki
Desteni Forum
Desteni I Process
Equal Money System
Journey to Life Group
Eqafe Life Products - Self Help
Creation's Journey to Life
Heaven's Journey to LIfe
Earth's Journey to Life
Friday, November 23, 2012
for further context: Giving Up on Myself - Life Review
Also please visit my previous blogs, if you haven’t already:
Day 97 - Giving up is an elitist privilege
Day 98 - Giving up is an elitist privilege - Part 2 - Self commitments
I realize that in any moment that I am not here in breath, as aware of myself breathing within my physical body, I am in a realm of the mind, existing within / as energy as participating in thoughts / feelings / emotions / projections / imaginations, within this I see, realize and understand that once I notice, become aware of myself existing as energy, I have a decision, I am faced with a choice - will I stop myself as the mind and bring myself back to myself as the physical within/as breath, or will I allow myself to continue, to follow the mind's temptation, within believing I am defined by it, by the emotions / feelings, within believing that I cannot stop - who I am within this decision, how I chose to be is what defines me in every moment, and within realizing this choice I see how I am in fact creating myself within every decision I make, so wither to stand up in self honesty or to give up as the mind - is always up to me, thus, when and as I see myself facing the decision, the choice, of stopping myself as the mind possession, and bringing myself back here to the physical within breath, or following the mind within a self belief that I cannot be freed from it and within self interest as the pursue of happiness and good feelings - I chose myself as life
I realize that I have allowed the idea I have that I am incapable of stopping myself while in an energetic possession, as back chat come up of "but I don't know how to do it", "I cannot stop", "this depression is stronger than me", to prevent me from actually stopping, to prevent me from even trying, as allowing myself to give up and be submissive to the energetic experience, within this I realize that as long as I participate with this back chat, as accepting the idea that I cannot stand up from the energetic experience, I will never actually stand and continue proving to myself my idea of myself was correct, not realizing that this idea isn't based on physical facts but just on a mind manipulation to keep me enslaved and trapped within the energetic experience, on the other hand, I realize that if I do push myself through the point, as not allowing the back chat to direct me, and within this to stop my acceptance of the idea that I am incapable, and push myself to breathe and support myself through bringing myself back to the physical as jumping up and down and shaking my body, or massaging my hands, I will be able to step out of the possession, because I realize the energetic possession requires my attention and participation for it to exist within me as my experience, thus, when and as I see myself going into and accepting the back chat of not believing I can do it, I stop myself and breathe, I bring myself back to the physical body in any way that is possible within the context of the situation I am in, I chose to support myself and to stop myself from giving more power/energy to the possession and instead give myself the power through standing up from within it, proving to myself that I am the directive principle and I am not a puppet at the demand of the mind - I am here, I am life, I am not energy, I realize that the energy needs me for it to exist and I do not need the energy to be here as myself stable in breath
I realize that when I exist in an energetic possession I fear stopping it, I fear letting go of it because it is how I know myself, I have defined myself as it, within this I realize that this fear is a mind mechanism to keep me from standing up as life, I realize this fear is not valid because I am here through all the experiences, I have been here through all the possessions, I have been here to see them come and go and change - thus I am here is independent on the energy possession, and doesn't require it to exist as I am here, thus, when and as I experience myself resisting to stop the energetic possession within fear of letting go of it, I stop myself and breathe, I remind myself that I am here, I breathe, and stand up, within this, I commit myself to investigate the point of fear further, and each time the fear/back chat comes up I commit myself to investigate it within writing and forgive myself for all that I have seen within it as my acceptance and allowance, to make the point clear to me, so that I don't fall in it again
I realize that within the construct of giving up on myself, within the belief I cannot stop the energetic possession as I believe it is stronger than me, I realize that within this I am trying to take the easy way out within self interest while disregarding myself as life and the consequences of my actions, within this I realize that I have used giving up to distract myself from the problems that are here, that are evident in the physical reality, as taking the easy way out and not pushing myself with all I've got to change the current situation of reality as myself, as it is based in inequality and results in much pain and suffering for many beings that cannot practice the privilege of giving up because it would cost them their life, thus I realize that within giving up I am not only giving up on myself but am allowing myself to give up on the pain and suffering that others are experiencing because of the very construct of the system as it exists today, the same system that has given me so much as consumerism, that I can turn a deaf ear to the abuse because it doesn't concern me directly due to being the elite of this world, and thus allow myself to give up in self interest
I realize that the only reason I am giving up is because I can, because I don't experience the immediate consequences, because I have support within the system and thus am not in a physical survival mode, within this I realize that giving up is an elitist privilege, that only those with money can afford giving up, as a childish moment of not wanting to take self responsibility and wanting others, as slaves, to do the hard work for them while they momentarily give up to then after the small "brake from life" return as if nothing has happened and as if there are no consequences, within this I realize that by exercising my privilege of giving up I am dismissing and disregarding all those that cannot afford to give up because their life circumstances is based in physical survival and if they allow themselves to give up they will actually die/suffer, within this I realize that by giving up I am accepting the situation of the world as it is and am actually deriving benefit from it, as stating within myself that I don't care about any one and anything that is suffering in the world, all I care about is that "I don't feel like it" and thus allow myself to give up, within this I commit myself to become aware of points/situations/events where I find myself giving up and stop myself within and as breath, within realizing that giving up is not valid and is a vicious way out of taking self responsibility within what seams to be an innocent/naïve self belief of incompetency, but in fact is deliberate and cruel considering all in the world that can't stand up for themselves and are waiting for me to stand up for them within the world system as I stand up for myself within the mind
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Thursday, October 18, 2012
continue from my previous blogs:
Day 59 - Redefining friendship
Day 60 - friendship - Part 2 - Care and Support
Day 61 - Friendship - Part 3 - Care and Support - Self Forgiveness
Day 62 - Friendship - Part 4 – Limitation
Day 63 - Friendship - Part 5 – Quality Time
I commit myself to being clear within myself as to why I want to spend time with people/friends, and within that to make sure I am self honest with myself within not deluding myself that I want to spend time with the other being while in fact I have other hidden agendas and am just using them to keep me company as I do not wish to do it alone, within this, I commit myself to stop myself from participating with such deception towards self and towards others and to be clear and direct towards myself and the other as to what I actually want, I commit myself to stop myself form participating within/as manipulation through expressing that I want something but actually using the other to get a hidden agenda, within this I commit myself to stop using and abusing the structure/platform of friendship for my own self interest and allow myself to see the other as equal to me, and thus to give as I would like to receive, and do onto the other as I would like to be done on to me, and thus I commit myself to practice and apply being direct and straight forward and not manipulate within self interest
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to spend time with people as I see as my friends, in order to do something, anything, as long as it will distract me from myself as who I am, and allow me to zone out into the bubble of friendship/entertainment as we spend time together, not actually communicating or supporting each other but just spending time, really wasting our time away, within a belief that we are doing something valuable as spending time with a friend, within the social construct that spending time with friends/loved one is valuable
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to escape from myself through entertaining myself within friends, and within that using and abusing our friendship as a form of self dishonesty, using my friends to distract myself from myself and by that making them accomplices to the crime, so to speak, while presenting it as an innocent activity as spending "quality time" together, within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to take my friends with me down the path of self dishonesty as distracting self from self within entertainment/activities, instead of standing as self integrity and supporting myself and them as myself within building self honesty and self respect through investigating self intimacy within oneself and one's relationship with another
I commit myself, when I see myself wanting to distract myself with friends and entertainment, to stop myself and breathe, to look within self honesty at the point I am running away from, and to write it out through process of self forgiveness, to allow myself to free myself form the point at hand that I am resisting and through releasing the point to be able to actually spend time with people/friends for that reason, and not to use them as hiding from myself
I commit myself to establish effective relationships with people/friends and within that to establish effective and supportive communication, through firstly opening myself up within writing for/as myself, and then to share points of relevance with them, to be a standing/living example of walking a process of self honesty, so that they too have the opportunity to walk, and we have a chance to actually support each other into an effective/supportive relationship/friendship
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from my friends as myself through only allowing us to communicate through the wall of external activity, as creating a safe zone to protect myself from the possibility of exposure, due to fear of within being exposed to be judged/rejected/ridiculed, within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear myself due to not ever allowing myself to actually be myself and thus to know myself, and within that to fear what I might express/expose myself in an unexpected way, that isn't accepted by myself/my friend/society, within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to keep myself safe within not exposing my true nature while not allowing myself to realize that I am protecting myself as personality/character/mind while not allowing myself to express myself and expand as life
I commit myself to apply the tool of writing, self forgiveness, and self corrective statement, to allow myself to face myself and finally see who the hell I really am, to through knowing myself within self forgiveness to stop fearing myself as the unknown and thus to allow myself to through knowing myself to direct myself to change to that which is best for all and stop all that I exist as now which results in shame and fear
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define some people as close friends and some not, within that to allow myself to expose/express myself only to those people that I trust as being "close" friends, within this I forgive myself for not accepting ad allowing myself to realize that by separating groups of friends into categories I am in fact manipulating myself to through feeling comfortable with some people to allow myself to open up to them, but not seeing the self deception within opening up only when it is convenient, within that not allowing myself to see that I am not actually exposing/expressing myself but am allowed to express my prominent character as myself
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be different with each person, as evaluating who the person is and what they will accept and to adjust myself accordingly, thus allowing myself to exist as a split personality, within this I commit myself to stabilize myself and to remain stable here as/within breath with each person/people I interact with, thus allowing myself to actually express myself as who I actually am and not change myself according to who is around me, within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to present a different me according to who I am with and not allowing myself to see the self abuse and self compromise within this, as I have given more value to being accepted by others rather than actually accepting myself
I commit myself to changing myself within all relationships to become an effective human being, to support myself and the other within self honesty, to not accept myself and anyone else as myself, as anything less than who we are as life, and thus, I commit myself to stop all my current friendship as I know them to be, and I commit myself to build new communication with my friends, communication that is based on self honesty, intimacy, and the willingness to face ourselves through the assistance and support of the other, I commit myself to use the platform of friendship for the betterment of all as equal within the principle of equality and oneness as what is best for all, through starting with changing myself first within/as myself and communication as myself, so that I can prove to myself that change is possible and relationships can change and be effective and supportive, and within that to stand as a living example.
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Wednesday, September 26, 2012
I have an experienced myself many times as being a burden on those around me. this experience makes it hard for me to ask for help because I come to ask for help from within a starting point of believing that I'm a burden/nuisance , and then as a result I create myself as burden/nuisance and the other being will pick up on it, and treat me as such. I then will go into my victimized character as if I'm this helpless being that, on the one hand, needs the other being's help, and on the other hand blame them for being impatient with me. Within this I manipulate myself into believing that they are the cause for my feeling as a nuisance/burden, not allowing myself to see that I have created the situation through my starting point as the self belief of being a burden.
I forgive
myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe I am a burden on others
I forgive
myself for accepting and allowing myself to ask for help from a starting point
of believing I am a burden, within that not realizing that I am creating myself
as a burden through participating within/as the starting point of believing I
am a burden
I forgive
myself for accepting and allowing myself to blame others for giving me a
feeling that I am a burden to them while they help me and give me assistance,
within this I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize
that the point of blame is actually reflecting me back to me because I know
within self honesty that I am the cause/responsible for my feeling of being a
burden through participation within the starting point of being a burden, and
thus I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that I
am the sole creator of myself as a burden within feeling I am a burden/nuisance
to others, and thus I realize that no one else is to blame for the experience I
create within/as myself through my
direct participation as my starting point
I forgive
myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe myself to be a burden based
on memories of people making fun of me for asking too many questions, within
this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to live in the past as
memory and to recreate the past experience/emotion through participating within
the starting point of that which I brought as myself from the past, thus not
allowing myself to get our of the loop as I keep recreating it again and again
through memory
I forgive
myself for accepting and allowing myself to ask for assistance/help within a
starting point of desire for attention, within this, I forgive myself for
accepting and allowing myself , when I recognize that the other is not giving
me the attention I am looking for and thus I will not get the high energy I
wanted, to allow myself to go into the polarity of believing I am being a
burden, within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to react
within/as emotions when I do not get the attention I was looking for, and to be directed by the emotion within the
desire for feeling good while avoiding feeling bad, thus to manipulate myself
within the situation to create a good feeling within/as myself, instead of
allowing myself to see within/as self honesty how this construct play out, and
stopping myself from participating within/as it
I forgive
myself for accepting and allowing myself to manipulate those around me through
asking their help in order to get attention, and within that to then blame them
when they do not give me the 'loving' attention I was hoping for, instead of
taking self responsibility for myself within realizing the
deception/manipulation I have been participating within only for my own self
interest as getting a high energetic feeling at the expense of others, and then
when I do not get what I wanted I become spiteful within blaming them for
making me feel like I am a burden, while I have allowed the situation to unfold
through my desire for attention/good feelings
I forgive
myself for not accepting and allowing to learn/investigate the point I am
asking for help in regards to, and thus not allowing myself to be independent
within the point, but instead I'd rather abdicate my responsibility within
allowing myself to count/depend on others instead of walking the process of
learning how to apply myself and thus not be dependent but able to stand
independently, within this I realize that there are points that will take time
for me to learn thus I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to
be patient with myself within learning something new but instead to define
myself as "I'm not good at that" or "I don't know that" and
thus to not allow myself to approach that point within practicality, and thus
stay in the loop of asking others to assist me with points I am able within
self honesty to learn and assist myself with
I forgive
myself for accepting and allowing myself to prefer not knowing how to do things
and then be dependent on others to help me, rather then taking the time and
walking the process to learn the point for myself, within this I realize that
each time I ask for help in regards a point I know I could have learnt to do
myself if I had given myself the opportunity, I go into the character of
"I'm a burden" as a form of punishment of experiencing guilt for not
knowing that which I was lazy to learn, within this I forgive myself for
accepting and allowing myself to instead of once and for all learning the point
within stopping the self belief that "I cannot do it" I go into
guilt/shame and within that to the character of "I'm a burden" thus
remaining in the loop of mind as characters, feeding off each other and
creating more energy through conflict/emotions.
I commit
myself to when I see myself experiencing myself as being a burden when asking
for help, I stop myself and breathe, I check my starting point, I look at am I
asking something from laziness/desire for attention or do I actually need
assistance, if I see that I need the assistance I breathe and commit myself to
get the help I need without allowing thoughts of me being a burden to possess
me, within realizing that within those thought I allow myself to become a
burden, if I see that I am asking from a starting point of being lazy/desire
for attention, I stop myself within breath, and get off my ass and do what
needs to be done through supporting myself to assist myself
I commit
myself to take responsibility within learning points that I can assist myself
with, and within that I commit myself to be patient with myself and allow
myself to go through the process of learning new points to assist me with, and
to stop myself within/as breath when I go into the belief of "I don't know
how to do it" because I realize this is self manipulation to abdicate
responsibility, and thus I stop.
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
I wrote a
blog for today on different computer and it froze, and my initial thought was
that it’s a legitimate reason to not have a blog done for today, “my computer
froze” is the modern excuse for “my dog ate my home work”.
But, if I have
made a commitment to myself to write and post a blog each day, then why am I looking
for excuses to get out of my commitment.
Once I allow
excuses to break my self-commitment it snowballs and sooner than later any
little thing becomes an excuse. So this time I saw myself going into the
pattern of looking for an excuse to excuse me from standing by/as the
commitment I gave myself, I saw myself going into back chat such as “what can I
do, I can’t be expected to write another blog, or to try to right it again…”
and I hear this voice in my head in a joking tonality like it would be absurd
to expect me to write again, not comprehending that I am writing for MYSELF and
not for anyone else, there is no external expectation I have to obey, it’s just
me and my commitment I made to/for myself, and within this I know that giving
myself excuse to get myself out of the commitment I made for myself is complete
self diminishment, and what would the outcome of that be? the outcome would be
another point to the “mind’s team” in the accumulation game, and one less point
for self within establishing myself as self trust self direction and self
support.
Not to say I
am in a war with my mind, but every action/decision I participate in is either
supporting myself as life or is supporting myself as the mind.
So, I’m glad
the computer froze, and I’m glad I had an opportunity to clear this point
within/as myself – I am writing this blog for me, I have made a commitment
for/as myself to support myself within walking myself out of the chains of the
mind and into life.
I realize
this blog is not only supporting because of the actual writing/self
forgiveness/self commitments, it is supportive through it being a commitment of
self dedication, through the writing of the blog, every day I commit to myself,
I dedicate myself to myself as life.
I forgive
myself for accepting and allowing myself to look for excuses to get out of
commitments/responsibilities instead of standing within self dignity/honor and walking
my responsibility within/as breath, within respecting and honoring myself as
life
I forgive
myself for not accepting and allowing myself to write the blog from a starting
point of self support and have only written from a starting point of external
commitment, not realizing that I am walking this process as/for myself within
the principle of oneness and equality, thus anything within/as process that I do
not do for/as myself, that I do for someone else’s expectations of me, is self
deception, and will only last for that long, I forgive myself for not accepting
and allowing myself to realize this is a process of SELF, and thus all
points/motivations move from/as self or will not last, and within self motivation
as self movement as self direction I realize I must will myself within every
breath to make the decision, to chose myself as life, time after time, blog
after blog, breath after breath, time and time again, until… well, I don’t know
until when, until it is done.
I forgive
myself for accepting and allowing myself to look for excuses to not write
myself blog without allowing myself to realize the self compromise within
making a decision and not standing my it, within this I forgive myself for
accepting and allowing myself to sabotage myself deliberately throughout my
process through braking my own word time and time again, creating myself as not
trust worthy in my own eyes, to make it easier for myself to slack off and not
take responsibility because I am still moved/motivated by the force of self interest,
within this I realize that only through pushing/willing myself to honor myself
as life, to honor my decisions, to live within a principle of what is best for
all, will I be able to free myself from the chains of self interest and be able
to trust myself, to respect myself and to actually enjoy myself, and not have
to hide within shame of who I am as what I have allowed myself to be and exist
as, through my participation within/as the mind as self interest.
I forgive
myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe myself as I give myself
excuses and justifications to slack off and not stand by the decision I have
made, within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to
manipulate myself into believing my own deception, not allowing myself to see
the self sabotage within it, I forgive myself within this, that I have accepted
and allowed myself to always look for the easy way out even after I have proven
to myself time and time again, that the easy way out is in the long run the
long way, and that the easy way out will never give me the outcome I am
actually, really looking for, and that outcome is to be able to trust myself,
to appreciate myself, to know myself for what I really am, to face my true
nature as I have created myself, and to know I am directing myself to change
into being the being I actually want to be, and not simply to accept myself as
the being I have created myself as just because that’s the easy way out, but to
take the hard way of self investigation, because I realize I’d rather see/live
the ugly truth than to accept myself to live/exist as a lie, because I realize
that living as a lie is not living
I commit
myself to writing/posting a daily blog within the journey to life, because I realize
the support it gives me to make a directive decision and stand by it, no excuses
no justifications.
I commit
myself to remind myself that I am in fact writing this daily blog for myself,
as self support, and to remind myself the value of standing by my word/decision
I have given myself, within realizing that if I break my word to myself how can
I ever trust myself, and within that I realize that I have broken my word to
myself many time in the past, and for each time I will have to accumulate myself
as self trust, until I am actually trust worthy in my own eyes.
I commit
myself to writing every day practical commitments that I can stand by, because I
realize the self sabotage/deception within making big commitments “in the air”
that I cannot apply, within creating another point of not standing by my
commitment, thus I commit myself to be practical, so that I can actually stand
by it and be able to see/assess that I am in fact standing
I commit
myself to when seeing myself within giving myself excuses/justification to get
out of a self responsibility I stop and breathe and remind myself the simply
math of accumulation within realizing that each time I fall is remembered as accumulation
within the grand equation of my life, and thus through my participation with
justification/excuses I am making the path harder for me in the long run,
within this I commit myself to push myself from falling in the tempting trap of
justification
I commit
myself to breathe, I commit myself to slow down, I commit myself to
build/establish self –honesty within/as myself through the constant application
of the tools as writing/self forgiveness/self corrective statements
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